Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The geese of Growmore

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why do asian people eat each other? because they are cannibles

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

thumb_up thumb_down +37

That's what he said.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops