What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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How did the blond's brain cells die? She had a very acute case of Parkinson's disease.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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What do I smell like to you?? Crap.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Baseball

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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PENIS

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I can't think of a joke!

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Come in

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What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

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-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

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25

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

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a black father

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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