What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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My Nan, that is all.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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