Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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