What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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Cripples are lame.

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Knock Knock.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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