What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

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38 studio's new game... Finance City

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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