My cat just died.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Peas

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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