Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops