What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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gingers

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Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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