What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

The government

What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

How many unicorns does it take to change a lightbulb? Unicorns do not use lightbulbs, their technology (magic) is way too advanced to waste fossil fuels and pollute the air. Also, you can't change a lightbulb with hooves. ;)

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

Why did the man hang himself? Because his pistol misfired.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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