Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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What's worse than holocaust jokes? The Rwandam Genocide.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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