What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

Chicken

How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

guess what? WHAT? Idk.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

My dog barks when someones at the door.

Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...