why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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