A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...