What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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