"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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An Asian with a big dick.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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where's mom I killed her

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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