Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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