whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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knock knock come in

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

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What is it called when a black guy gets robed A crime

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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