What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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i saw amango it splootered

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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