I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

When life throws knives at you, run away.

A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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