What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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