"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yanter, Look it up

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Brain fart

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

thumb_up thumb_down -7

0 + 0 = 0

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

thumb_up thumb_down -11

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down -11

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

thumb_up thumb_down -15

1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

thumb_up thumb_down -19

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops