Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Cripples are lame.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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