Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Donald Trump

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Cripples are lame.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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