A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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