A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Whats cold and frozen? ice

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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John lazzaro likes dick

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops