What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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