A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

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I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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