What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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Women's rights

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

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What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops