A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why is the black guy cross the rode. he did not' he got in a truck. i know it does not make s...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops