What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

What is life? Paul.

Fat? Jesse Z

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

Seriosly. too much sex again?

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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