What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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Why did the blonde walk into the bar? To get a beer.

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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