why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

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How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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