What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Your adopted.....

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

A chicken walked into the bar...

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

Yes

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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