why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Your adopted.....

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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