Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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