What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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