haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

12/23/2012

knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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