SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

What rhymes with milk...milf

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Sex

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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