Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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