What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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What do you call an amazing person Good

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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