What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

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Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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