How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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"You're not very subtle, are you?" asked Nyacinth of the Prince. "Coo-fif," replied the Prince, a sly smile on his face.

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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