What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

thumb_up thumb_down -31

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

thumb_up thumb_down -31

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

2

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -33

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops