What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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