What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

One time i was sitting down

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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