Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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