dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Apple hates Blackberry.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how man

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A house comes around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops