why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Please ignore this statement.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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