A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

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Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

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A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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