There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

A cat playing laser tag.

Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grasp or throw anything, so the point is moot unless they evolve thumbs for the sole purpose of chucking wood.

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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