What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

i like turtles

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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