"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

Who has no penis Religious Believers

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

96

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...