Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops