Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

TRICERATOPS!

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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