My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

A black man walks out of a police station

A man walks into a bar. Ow

If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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