Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

white or wheat? wheat please.

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

Tyler Bishop is a waffle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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