Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the man say to his doctor?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Hej Erik och Leo!!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down -32

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

dat shoe shine tho

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

well use a tissue!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops