What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Happy Monday!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops