Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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