What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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Gus's mom

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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L.A Clippers 2000-2012 season!!!!

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A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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