In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

I'm Coming

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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