What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

I'm Coming

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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