roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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