Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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what did the girl said to the stalker? i dont know cuz if i did, i would be a stalker

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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1)Where do you find a turtle with no legs? 2)Where? 1)Where you left it. 1)... Knock Knock... 2)Who's there? 1)...Not the turtle...

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what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

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So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

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Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

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Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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You tie a noose around your neck, you jump off a cliff and before you hit the ground you shoot yourself in the head.

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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