What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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What did the man say to his doctor?

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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